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Post by jetylefr on Jul 7, 2011 23:02:30 GMT -5
oh look... I did.
yup...
I throw it at your head, and it gives you a concussion. I then plug it in, and slowly force it down your throat, burning as it goes. You die of suffocation and burns.
Me
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 8, 2011 14:56:34 GMT -5
You set up a death trap and fall into it.
Root beer.
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 8, 2011 16:11:52 GMT -5
you drink too much and get loads of cavities. the dentist, when trying to fix them, accidentally shoves a drill through the back of your head.
college
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 8, 2011 18:01:01 GMT -5
It kills you by its very nature.
A cruller.
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 10, 2011 7:34:57 GMT -5
it kills you by it's very nature. (see how cheap that is?)
cheapskates
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 10, 2011 9:57:17 GMT -5
No, I do not. The nature of crullers is in no way harmful.
The cheapskates swindle you out of your common sense and you kill yourself after that.
Several crullers.
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 11, 2011 0:09:18 GMT -5
ugh... you choke on them while trying to eat several at the same time.
(how is college by it's very nature deadly?)
putting two lumps of sugar in tea instead of 1.
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Post by Odin on Jul 11, 2011 15:15:27 GMT -5
Unknowingly you contracted diabetes and the extra sugar sends you into shock and then cardiac arrest.
a cheese ball made from oil.
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 11, 2011 16:27:46 GMT -5
It hits you in the head and pushes you a few inches forward into the car that wouldn't have otherwise hit you.
Grapefruit.
(College, by its nature, will wear you down)
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 13, 2011 15:33:52 GMT -5
(soooo...? being tired doesn't kill. be more specific! I can think of ways college could kill, but you didn't actually say any of them)
You steal a grapefruit from the wrong guy. The guy who hired you to steal it no longer wants anything to do with you, and has you killed.
llama soup
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Post by Odin on Jul 13, 2011 23:30:52 GMT -5
llama lovers from all over the world come to your house and kill you over the soup incident. nobody is prosecuted. you're name is stricken from the records and it's almost as if you never existed.
hargle
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 14, 2011 4:08:13 GMT -5
It's the sound you make as you're being strangled. Making such an uncouth noise only quickens your impending death.
Puns.
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 14, 2011 12:20:36 GMT -5
puns... such a novel idea. you know what else is a novel idea?
books... (you make this joke at a dinner party for the 'illiterate murderer's club')
a tree.
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 14, 2011 18:52:36 GMT -5
That was a good one.
You're about to be hanged for high treason, but they made the poor choice of using a dead tree. When you fall, the branch breaks and you survive... Moments before it falls and crushes your skull.
Music that is oh so delicious.
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Post by Odin on Jul 14, 2011 22:51:48 GMT -5
the music is so delicious you eat the cd containing it which was not as tasty btw.
Executive decisions.
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 14, 2011 23:20:38 GMT -5
You make the executive decision to fire a mentally unstable employee. He turns you into soup.
A sash
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 15, 2011 12:16:26 GMT -5
it is a mayoral sah. you stole it from a wayward vagabond and he's obviously mentally unstable. He then stabs you with his mailbox flippy thing attached to a meter stick. then he plays with his pet firefly, but that doesn't matter because you're dead.
very... odd music.
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 15, 2011 14:39:57 GMT -5
It is The Residents, and it is so bizarre it turns your mind inside out, upside-down, backwards, and inverted all at once. You die from being too insane.
/##33id[[[/2HHJJjj|||/#///
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 15, 2011 21:36:17 GMT -5
The grammar Nazis put you, their greatest soldier, out of your misery. the stress must have been to much...
real nazis
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 15, 2011 23:32:48 GMT -5
Turns out your Jewish.
Making that joke.
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Post by Odin on Jul 17, 2011 5:23:49 GMT -5
turns out you made it in a synagogue.
Making that joke.
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 17, 2011 6:31:33 GMT -5
Turns out you made it in a synagogue. ;P
Brownies
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 18, 2011 21:55:29 GMT -5
you're in jail, and I bake you a pan of brownies with a file inside. you're too hungry from getting fed to little, and too crappy. you swallow the entire pan, and your cell-mate kills you for not sharing... bacon ice cream
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 18, 2011 23:20:17 GMT -5
You die from not eating enough bacon, because you can never have enough bacon.
Four player chess (I'm creating my own version)
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Post by Odin on Jul 19, 2011 2:18:48 GMT -5
when you lose the rules say you die. guess the rest.
I wish for four player checkess
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 19, 2011 5:37:58 GMT -5
Checkess... A hybrid between checkers and chess. The rules are complicated already, but when you add in two extra players, the rules are full of such convoluted logic, it destroys the universe.
Tautology.
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 21, 2011 12:25:17 GMT -5
you are unable to find a 'safe haven' during nuclear war.
Elvis
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 21, 2011 19:46:41 GMT -5
He steals your boat while you're in the Bermuda triangle.
Congratulations
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Post by jetylefr on Jul 22, 2011 11:05:01 GMT -5
you go off bragging to people about your awesome birthday presents, and the other guy who's birthday was yesterday who DIDN'T get any presents kills you for them.
pez
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Post by the1truesushiboy on Jul 22, 2011 18:08:33 GMT -5
You eat it, instead of giving it to me and I kill you.
Fuzz
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