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Post by DarkfireTaimatsu on Dec 16, 2006 0:59:30 GMT -5
"I am not a pig, T.K.!" "It's okay to be a pig..." "I'm sure it is, especially for pigs, but that's not me." --Patamon and T.K., Digimon (Season 1)
Yukari: "We're Team Yukari!" Tomo and Yomi: *listless* "Yaaay..." Osaka: "We're Team Sea Slug!" Chiyo: "What?!" Kaorin: "But sea slugs are so..." Osaka: "Go Team Sea Slug!" Chiyo and Kaorin: *listless* "Yaaay." --Azumanga Daioh, Episode 3
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Augen
Full Member
When God closes a door, he opens another door, which is guarded by vicious ogres.
Posts: 154
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Post by Augen on Jan 6, 2007 2:07:54 GMT -5
"Please don't shoot my brain." - A cyborg in Galaxy Express 999
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Post by Daybreak on Jan 7, 2007 15:39:36 GMT -5
Time for a couple REAL LIFE QUOTES!!! Strange, strange things happen when you get a lot of geeks together... (PLEASE NOTE: This one is mildly inappropriate, but I assure you, the parties involved said this without thinking about what it sounded like) Mel: *referring to a monster in a video game* Look! It's a Rocktopus! Madame President: I'll rock your pus! .... Everyone in the room: *shocked stare, then hysterical giggles* ---- Steph: We are the Secret Cuthulu Society! Kayleigh: And sewing group! ---- Sam: If you combine Jax, Stephanie, and Kathleen, you get one whole black person, one whole white person, and one whole Philappino. Me: Does that mean if you combine you and me, you get a whole French Canadian and a whole bunch of European midgets? ---- Kayleigh: Baby Dragon! Me: With a gimp wing! K: A pool of... Me: Froglings! K: How many? Me: An iiiiinfinite amount! ---- Kayleigh: *walking to the comic store with Tonje* Ugh, my jeans are soaked. I'm so changing when I get back. Tonje: Well, these are the ony jeans I have! K: We can go another time when it's not raining... T: Gaming books, jeans, gaming books, jeans. I could game naked! ---- And of course... Random girl: @#*$! I lost the game! Everyone at the table: ARGH! Yep. College is interesting times. And I can't even put some of the best quotes here *cackles*
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Post by DarkfireTaimatsu on Jan 9, 2007 1:21:59 GMT -5
"For longer than I can remember, I've been looking for someone like you... Someone with a head like yours and a torso too. Birds sing and you're gonna pay, the end!" --Tak's poem to Zim, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"Your magical love adventure begins now!" --Zim, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"You're on fire!" "Am I? Ah well. GIR, I feel I now know enough about human affection. I hate it! Especially the part with the beans! Our friend Tak is no longer useful to me." --GIR and Zim, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"You're a bigger fool than I ever imagined!" "Huh?" "You're a bigger fool than I ever imagined!" "Eh?" "You're confused. Allow me to explain." --Tak and Zim, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"Yes, yes, so you blame me for your horrible life, blah, blah, big deal!" "This is about taking your mission, Zim. Not revenge!" "You're after revenge!?!" "No! It's not about revenge! It's about taking what is rightfully mine! I should've been an Invader! I should've been part of the Great Assigning! I shouldn't have to be stealing this planet from you!" "You're after my robot bee!!!" "NO! Listen to me! Listen... carefully!" --Zim and Tak, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"It seems the enemies have a common enemy: Tak! She's Irken and she's after my job and your planet!" "Oh, come on! I like Tak! And she hates you! You're just jealous of--" "This has nothing to do with jelly!" --Zim and Dib, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"The great thing about your people, Dib, is that most of them don't notice. All the see is another faceless corporate venture, not a plan for world conquest." "Wait, is there really a difference?" --Tak and Dib, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"Your head smells like a puppy!" --GIR, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
"You're a worse pilot than I am! Wait..." --Zim, Invader Zim (Tak: The Hideous New Girl)
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Post by dragonblade261 on Jan 17, 2007 15:10:54 GMT -5
Me: I wanna be the beggar! Ashley: Why? Me: I like the dying beggar act! *I collapse in the desk and cough*Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllpppppppppppp meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...*hackhack*I seeee teeeeehhhhhhhhh liiiiiighhhhhhhhhhhht....Iieeeeeeeeeoooooooooooooooou.....*I collapse and twitch*
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okuni
Junior Member
'How to Win' by Sanzo
Posts: 57
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Post by okuni on Jan 18, 2007 8:33:20 GMT -5
ooooo....That reminds me of a time my friends and I were playing D&D and our characters were resting at a pub. One pc was an ogre that was being poked by an NPC.
NPC: *begins poking ogre* Ogre: Poking not fun. *npc continues poking* O: Stop poking. *poke, poke,poke* O: Poking not fun! *pokes NPC in the eye. removes eye from socket* NPC: YA POKED ME BLOODY EYE OUT, YA DAMNED TROLL!! Ogre: See? Poking not fun.
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Post by dragonblade261 on Jan 18, 2007 15:14:38 GMT -5
No Mr. Ogre Man. Poking not fun. --- Me: You see my friends....they are watching. EVERYWHERE they are watching....We must DESTROY, and CONQUER them! WHO IS WITH ME?! *My cats look at each other* Me: *sigh* Look, we are the only ones who know about the squirrel menace! They are siding with the Staring Wallpaper Cult! WE MUST DESTROY, OR GO TO WAR! *muttering* 'Sides, I can't recruit any more thanks to SWINDLE HERE! *Swindle blinks* Me: Quit fightin' all the other cats! This ain't a territory war! Tailess looks promissing, but he is enemies of us AND squirrel!
Dominique: You're as ugly as him! *points to Oscar the catfish* Me: *to Oscar* YOU'RE SO HANDSOME! *Oscar nods*
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Dragyn
Junior Member
CAKE!
Posts: 70
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Post by Dragyn on Feb 22, 2007 21:53:52 GMT -5
"Buy USA at retail price, get the World FREE!"
-It's an ad for buying maps, but it still sounds funny.
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Post by dragonblade261 on Feb 26, 2007 15:13:34 GMT -5
Bridge To Terabithia: Jesse: How do you know Janice Avery is in there?*points to girls bathroom with sobs coming from it* Leslie: Watch. *May Belle enters bathroom* *2 seconds later* May Belle*emerging from bathroom*: AAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
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Augen
Full Member
When God closes a door, he opens another door, which is guarded by vicious ogres.
Posts: 154
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Post by Augen on Mar 3, 2007 21:19:27 GMT -5
"Without me cure you out of luck, and me no give a flying... duck!" -Relmar the dwarf.
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Post by DarkfireTaimatsu on Mar 3, 2007 22:43:38 GMT -5
"Hi, there! I'm Squirrel Girl. And this li'l fella's my faithful sidekick, Monkey Joe. We're not supposed to show up until issue two... ...But there're some important things we need to talk about before you go any further. See, there's a lot of questionable stuff in this book, and we don't think it's suitable for everybody. Especially kids! I can't stress this enough--you shouldn't try to do anything you see the Great Lakes Avengers do in this comic... Like Mr. Immortal! And especially the stuff he does on page eight! Right, Monkey Joe?" "Chrtt" "Why, look, it's Grasshopper! What're you doin' here?" "Well, since I'm not really in this issue either, thought I'd poke my head in for some valuable "face-time." So? What's up?" "Oh, Monkey Joe and I were doing a P.S.A. for the kids, warning 'em about replicable acts 'n' stuff." "Kids? What kids? Only people reading comics these days are overweight men in their thirties with poor hygiene, and still living with their parents. Heck, if most of 'em did some a' the dangerous crap in this comic, it'd probably do the human gene pool a favor. That is, if any of 'em had a chance of reproducing sexually." "Oh, dear..." MONKEY JOE SAYS: "Hey, fanboys! Don't take that lying down! Write an angry letter to Marvel today!" --Squirrel Girl, Monkey Joe, and Grasshopper (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 1)
"Shh. I am here. All is well." "Y'know w-what I need to hear, darlin'. T-tell me again about your kind." "Of course. Like you, Craig-Hollis, my people are old souls... You are my ageless-love. And as long as I am here... ... for us, the centuries slip by like forgotten moments in time. Do not fear, my life-mate." "I'll never be alone." *Dinah is struck by lightning, ripping her in two* --Dinah Soar and Mr. Immortal (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 1)
"Any change at all?" "Nope. He's just been illegally downloading the same song all day. 57 different covers, though..." "Which song?" From computer: "One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do..." "Aimee Mann?" "Magnolia soundtrack." "Ooh. Not a good sign." MONKEY JOE SAYS: "Friends don't let friends play the Magnolia soundtrack." --Flatman, Doorman, and Monkey Joe (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 2)
"...And here we are. New York, New York! So nice, they named it twice. The Big Apple. The City that Never Sleeps!" "It smells like pee." "That's just Penn Station, Demarr. Come on..." --Flatman and Doorman (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 2)
MONKEY JOE SAYS: "A vigilante operating as an urban myth only works for his first year of continuity. Tops." --Monkey Joe (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 2)
"The thing is, I've been meaning to join the GLA for some time." "Really? Well, the Great Lakes Avengers would be honored to have you as a member, Living Lightning!" ""Great Lakes Avengers"? Oh, sorry. I thought you were the Gay/Lesbian Alliance." --Living Lightning and Flatman (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 2)
"Hey there. It's me again. I just wanted you to know that I read a few pages ahead... ...and...well... I'm kinda upset by the way this comic is dealing with serious women's issues." "Tell me about it, Squirrel Girl! The way females are portrayed in these things? It's disgusting. Especially these impossible body-standards." "Oh, my! This poor lady! I think all her internal organs got squeezed up into her chest." "But recently, what's bothered me the most... ...is how cavalierly comics have treated subjects like rape and violence towards women." "I don't get it, Big Bertha. Why would they do that?!" "Oh, I'll tell you why! Because most comic book writers... ...are overweight men in their thirties with bad hairlines who never got any action in high school!" MONKEY JOE SAYS: "Or college!" --Squirrel Girl, Big Bertha, and Monkey Joe (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 3)
"Squirrel Girl?" "Yeah?" "Sorry I've been tryin' to spook ya. It's just... I feel bad about Grasshopper. Like he died 'cause of me. And I guess the last thing I wanted after that... ...was any new members. And that's not really fair to you." "Aw. Thanks, Doorman. Here. Want a nut?" "Uh, okay. What kind you got?" "Oh, I got every kind you can think of here in my nutsacks." *to receptionist* "Of course I don't have an appointment! I'm a super hero! And I'm here on serious super hero business!" *cracking up* "Doc! Ha ha! Hey, doc! Squirrel Girl has nutsacks! Ha HA ha! *snort*" --Doorman, Squirrel Girl, and Flatman (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 3)
"Um...So, where exactly are we going?" "Maelstrom's secret base and doomsday device are at the bottom of Lake Michigan." "Wait. How do you...?" "My imaginary childhood friend told me. After I beat it out of him." "Oookay." "New kid? "Squirrel Girl," right? You comin'? We could really use the help." "W-what's the point?" "Well... ...If the whole universe goes, so will all the squirrels." "NO! Not the squirrels!" --Flatman, Mr. Immortal, and Squirrel Girl (GLA: Misassembled, Issue 4)
"I don't need luck. I eat nuts." --Squirrel Girl (Marvel Super-Heroes #8: Winter Special (January '92))
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Post by dragonblade261 on Mar 8, 2007 15:05:36 GMT -5
Me*rubbing my face on a magazine*: Preeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty baby llllllaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmaaaaaaa...
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Post by ZeroVX on Jul 16, 2007 7:46:16 GMT -5
Quotes from various comedians:
"Men have nice cars. Not because they like nice cars, but because they know that women like nice cars! Because men, are hunters! And the car is the bait! And then the lady comes up 'Oh hey, nice Porche!'. GOTCHA! That's how it is." - Dave Chappelle.
"I've been accused of having sex, with a person I did not have sex with, and let me tell you something, that is infuriating. 'Cause I'd be like 'I ain't touched her man! I'll kill you! Please believe me! Please believe me! Please believe me!'." - Dave Chappelle.
"There's no 13th floor in my apartment because of superstision, but c'mon. People on the 14th floor? You know what floor you're really on. What room are you in? 1401. No you're not! Jump out the window, you will die earlier!" - Mitch Hedberg.
"Any guy here, more than sex, if they had the choice between sex and this one other thing, any guy here, would want to be part of a heist." - Dane Cook.
"This guy told me that fossils, were the handiwork, of the devil. .........I had to remind myself to breathe." - Lewis Black.
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Post by Wolfy on Jul 24, 2007 22:48:50 GMT -5
"*hugs* tai... you are going to make some girl incredibly lucky someday... and if she doesn't treat you like the most wonderful person in the world that you are, i am personally going to rip her hair out and throw her off a bridge. you deserve the best." ~ Me, talking to taimatsu, when he was cheering me up after I had a particularly bad day. ... I mean every word, too. He's an awesome person, and any girl he's with had best treat him as such.
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Post by dragonblade261 on Jul 25, 2007 10:15:51 GMT -5
Voice on tape recorder(from CSI): Hi,. CSI guy...you wondering why you're here? Because you followed the evidence. And thats what CSIs do. So, breath quick, breath slow! Put your gun to your mouth, and pull the trigger. Anyway you like, you're gonna die here.*tape stops* Me(singing): Somebody is gonna need therapy after thiiiiiiii~iiiiiiiiiiiis!
Me: Y'know how dreams can be strage sometimes? Mom:....Okay, what was it? Me: I dreamt that Nick Stokes helped a manatee give birth. Mom: 0_o Me: He was pretty good at it too.
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Post by Wolfy on Aug 20, 2007 16:32:06 GMT -5
Exerpt from a lunch discussion with my mom, my aunt, my grandma, and me. We were discussing how no one in our family really LIKES asking Grandma for financial help:
Aunt: It's like 'Sure, I could ask mom for money, but I think I'd rather wear fiberglass underwear. But when the fiberglass underwear is dirty, you've already turned it inside out, and you're out of laundry detergent, what else can you do?'
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Post by Keerott on Aug 21, 2007 12:03:41 GMT -5
"Shall we find something to kill to cheer ourselves up?"-HK-47 Knights of the old republic (I am not sure if it is one or two.)
"It is suggested that you run while my blasters warm up, meatbag." HK-47 (same)
I think everything he says is quotable, best droid ever.
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Post by Keerott on Aug 21, 2007 12:24:55 GMT -5
"Definition: Love is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope...Love is knowing your target, putting them in your targeting reticle, and together, achieving a singular purpose against statistically long odds." HK-47 (In response to do you know what love is)
I forgot about that one.
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Post by NightWing on Aug 21, 2007 16:58:48 GMT -5
Those are all from KOTOR 1, I love HK-47, he rules
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Post by Eclectic Replicant on Aug 23, 2007 14:38:23 GMT -5
Craig Ferguson: Hello, my naughty monkeys!
Craig Ferguson: Russia is a land torn apart by alcohol and violence. Torn apart by alcohol and violence...REMIND YOU OF SOMEBODY?!
My two favorite lines.
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Post by dragonblade261 on Aug 26, 2007 17:51:02 GMT -5
I only gotta House quote now... WHAT?! I LIKE Eclectic Replicant's avatar! --- (House comes in a room, and sees Foreman with a car crash patient, still concious) House: She has CIPA. (Basically, she can't feel pain) Patient: What? No I don't! Foreman: How do you even figure that? House: Simple. I can think of 7 reasons right off the bat. Foreman: Let's hear them. House: One, she isn't shivering, even though anybody else would be freezing cold. Two, when you cleaned her wound, she flinched into the gauze-pad, not somebody who ever felt pain would do. Three, she has scars on her lips from when she was a baby and she was chewing on them. Four? She knows what it is. Foreman: ...Those are only four reasons. House: I know. I just picked a number off the top of my head. Want another reason? Okay. (House suddenly wacks his cane against her shin. She doesn't respond at all.) House(innocently): Want another two reasons?
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Post by Eclectic Replicant on Oct 5, 2007 20:16:03 GMT -5
Craig Ferguson: Self help books are pointless. Here's something for you... Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, and self help books are from Uranus.
Craig Ferguson: [Referring to Smokey the Bear] Kids: If a bear is wearing a ranger hat, it's because he ate the ranger!
Gwyneth Paltrow: I'm superstitious. Whenever I start a new movie I kill a hobo with a hammer.
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Post by dragonblade261 on Oct 22, 2007 15:35:30 GMT -5
Mom: Dragon, they are doing an interview with Doc Robbins (Robert David Hall) on TV! Me: *trips down stairs* Yay! Now I can figure out how to pronounce George Ead's and Eric Szmanda's last names! WOOT!
Alex: Yeah, we have to only talk to boys about this joke. Me: Pfft. I barely count as a woman, and I am barely count as human! Chris: So You're an alien looking for intelligent life? Me: Yes. And so far I have not found any.
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Post by Wolfy on Jan 21, 2008 23:46:40 GMT -5
DarkfireTaimatsu: "Hi-ho the varlet-o, a groin-kicking we will go!" says (10:49 PM): And a wolfy in a 'nana tree. wolfdancer says (10:49 PM): >.> <.< wolfdancer says (10:49 PM): Not a 'nana tree anymores. DarkfireTaimatsu: "Hi-ho the varlet-o, a groin-kicking we will go!" says (10:49 PM): No? wolfdancer says (10:50 PM): Just a regular old tree now. wolfdancer says (10:50 PM): *cuteburpnoise*
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Post by dragonblade261 on Jan 29, 2008 16:58:38 GMT -5
Me: Nn...I only watch Animal Planet. Derek: What? You are a kid! You're supposed to watch cartoons! Me: People, watch some CSI once in a while! The only kinds of cartoons I like are Transformers ones! Ms. Petri(hearing me): Ooh, did you see the movie? Me: Yeah! It was awesome! --- Transformers: Animated quotes!
Bumblebee: I'm gonna make it! I'm gonna make it! I'M NOT GONNA MAKE IT!
Prowl: Remember, Bumblebee, this exercise is to help us blend in. Bumblebee: ...Yah. Cause a motorcycle DRIVING ITSELF is totally natural. --- HOUSE! Wilson: You...put only YOUR name in the Secret Santa? House: Yep! Wilson: You do know that they are going to be so mad about this...right? House: Eh. As long as I don't mention that stupid moose hat. Wilson:...Reindeer. House: Sticks straight up not a chance. *Antler on hat actually WAVES at House and Wilson grins* Me: But...Hat...and...moosey....gyah........
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whitewolf1989
Junior Member
I'm sorry what's the question again?
Posts: 78
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Post by whitewolf1989 on Feb 4, 2008 11:16:31 GMT -5
I like to think like my blood group 'B positive'
(actually i'm an O negative but that wouldn't work as well)
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Post by NightWing on Feb 17, 2008 12:33:30 GMT -5
Transgression of quotes from Advance Wars: Day of Ruin
Will: Um... Hi. How's it going today? I... brought you something! I hope you like it.
??: A flower?
Will: Yeah. Well, it's not a real flower. It's plastic. You can't find many real flowers anymore. I found it while I was on a recon mission a few miles over.
??: It's... It's beautiful. What do you call it?
Will: Huh? Oh, I don't know. I'm not much of a flower... scientist...guy. Let me ask Lin.
??: No, I wait! I remember... This is a Cattleya isabella. It's a natural hybrid of the orchid family. Cattleya... Yes, that's it! That will be my name. I will be named after this beautiful flower you brought me. My name is Cattleya!
Will: Uh...Cattelya? Wow, that's...that's uh... That's kind of hard to say, actually. How about we call you Isabella? That's really pretty. It fits you better.
Isabella: Isabella? Oh! I love it, Will! I'm so happy!
Will: Yeah? Oh, good! I think it suits you.
Isabella: Thank you, Will!
Lin: Boy meets girl. Boy gives girl flower. Boy names girl. ...What's wrong with this world?
Will: Lieutenant! Um...what are you doing here?
Lin: I've been here. The whole time. Juuuust keeping an eye on you.
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Post by dragonblade261 on Feb 20, 2008 16:11:15 GMT -5
*House walks out of shower shirtless with towel atound his waist* Me: *fills cheeks up with air* Dad: *bursts out laughing* *After scene ends* Me: Ehn! Nooooooo! Dun end!
David: Wait, if there are space probes on Mars, THEN THE TRANSFORMERS CAN ALSO BE ON MARS! WOO! Me: Wha? Starscream is up on Mars! Yay!
Jared: Seriously. Stop talking. Y'know, the government should issue a law so that you will HAVE TO stop talking. Me: Dude. Seriously. They will sooner send Hugh Laurie back to Britain then make me keep my voice-hole shut, seeing what comes out of YOURS. RIGHT TO FREE SPEECH!
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Post by kioushan on Feb 20, 2008 19:36:01 GMT -5
And of course... Random girl: @#*$! I lost the game! Everyone at the table: ARGH! DAMN. I LOST THE GAME. WHAT NOW? Cheshire Cat: Oh, by the way, if you'd really like to know, he went that way. Alice: Who did? Cheshire Cat: The White Rabbit. Alice: He did? Cheshire Cat: He did what? Alice: Went that way. Cheshire Cat: Who did? Alice: The White Rabbit. Cheshire Cat: What rabbit? Alice: But didn't you just say - I mean - Oh, dear. Cheshire Cat: Can you stand on your head? Alice: Oh! -From the Disney version of Alice's Adventure in Wonderland.
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Post by {×ÏÑk§tÊ®88×} on Apr 17, 2008 8:33:42 GMT -5
".....Is that an MP3 player in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"-Mcmorbid comix.
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