|
Post by tabiris on Sept 24, 2007 17:26:22 GMT -5
And this fanfic has returned. One chapter up. Anyone who remembers the original will see the similarities between this and the original but notice the obvious changes (if there are any obvious ones). Heres a quick link to the first Chapter
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 1, 2008 15:29:59 GMT -5
Well here's another post in this old story that was never finished. but what's this? All of the story that was up is gone. why? cause i'm redoing it of course
i have need to reset this story for reasons anyone who copied the story and kept it (Me) will understand.
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 1, 2008 15:31:18 GMT -5
*giggle* Okay.
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 1, 2008 15:48:52 GMT -5
whats with the eye rolling? XC
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 1, 2008 15:53:05 GMT -5
Sorry. I use that face often. 'Tis one of my favorites and was more for your last comment. xc *hugs*
I understand though!
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 1, 2008 15:57:07 GMT -5
*snuggle*
Now I'll stop spamming where your story is supposed to go. ^^;
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 3, 2008 23:57:37 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]Chapter 1: Autumn Mists[/glow]
A thick fog rolled in over the graveyard silently.
Crunch. Crunch. Crunch.
Soft footsteps echoed over the graveyard, leaves crumbling undertow with each step.
Pat. Pat. Pat.
The owner of the footsteps reached a nicely swept cobblestone walkway. Eventually the footsteps fell silent. The mist cleared somewhat, well enough to see the one that was walking around the graveyard at this ungodly hour of the night.
What was at first glance a tall statuesque figure appeared to have shrunk to a fairly short size appearing to be about 9 or 10. A fair sized black raincoat covered the figure with the hood up and black pants. The tips of fingers and callused feet were the only visible flesh of this figure the fingers/toes ending with short claws rather than nails.
The creature turned its head from side to side, inspecting the graves one by one. Shaking its head the creature moved on to another section of the graveyard.
Eventually the creature came to a stop looking down at nicely polished marble grave marker. The creature raised its right arm at the stone and the nearby mist began to swirl around her right forearm as if it were magnetically attracted to it till the forearm was completely engulfed in mist. With a thunderous crack the grave marker and ground beneath it split, launching large chunks of dirt and concrete into the air. The mist around the creature dissipated with a loud hiss.
Plip. Plip. Plip.
In the aftermath of the explosion the only sound left was the soft sound of blood dripping off the creatures right hand to the ground. From the newly formed fissure a golden light poured out. The creature peered over the fissure slowly. If one were sitting in the fissure one would see the creatures face. Clearly female, the creatures left eye was black and similar to a human’s eye the other was covered by an eye-patch. Fangs adorned the creature’s frown of annoyance at the light below. A few errant strands of black hair were visible on the creature’s visage.
The light itself was a magical glyph to ward intruders from grave robbing. The creature reached toward the magic glyph only to have a bolt of electricity launch at her. Rather than attempt to dodge the electric bolt the creature caught it in her left hand, holding it in her hand as though it were nothing more than a child's baseball. The golden electricity became silver and the creature threw it into the center of the glyph; the glyph shattered sending a bolt of lightning high into the cloudless sky.
The creature stood still for a moment, her left arm seemed to have been ripped to shreds by the attack despite the successful counter. Bone, muscle, and skin grew at the point from which her arm had once been forming a new arm. Once the arm was finished restoring itself the sleeve of the raincoat regrew as well. The creature flexed her arm experimentally; once satisfied she jumped into the darkened fissure.
It did not take long for her to complete her plunder, only 30 seconds after diving into the fissure the creature emerged with a pole-like object covered with a white shroud and a small body tossed over her shoulder. The figure jumped up from the ground to the top of a nearby tree hopping along the treetops with inhuman agility till it was long gone.
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 4, 2008 0:07:05 GMT -5
Wow. Very detailed! ^^ I love it!
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 4, 2008 0:07:34 GMT -5
then it is a rival -attacks it-
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 4, 2008 0:14:06 GMT -5
*falls over laughing* You goof. I love you more. XP
|
|
|
Post by NightWing on Aug 4, 2008 0:38:00 GMT -5
Ominous beginning. I'm beginning to remember bits of this as I read, but this is much more detailed. Very nicely done.
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 4, 2008 0:42:54 GMT -5
indeed. this is more detailed by but the original opening was much longer at 2/3 of a page in MSWord with many more useless details tht overall took away from the CTVness of the story giving it a vibe that the CTV characters were second to my own characters. which should not be so even though she is more powerful than even kavonn.
but as we have seen here she gets more repremand for her power than in the previous version in which with a simple flick and a word she defeated the barriers as opposed to the much bleeding and even temporarilly loosing an arm of this one.
also i took out that cheese "ram cave" remark and redressed the new character even.
and i like the new title better
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 4, 2008 0:49:56 GMT -5
Awesome. ^^ well it's nice and smooth this time. ^^ I think it's an awesome opening.
|
|
|
Post by NightWing on Aug 4, 2008 0:52:13 GMT -5
What she said *points* =P
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 4, 2008 0:55:51 GMT -5
yuth. now i need a name for the new character. the old name would more imply to the characters original whom of which is a little too... not prudish for CTV. a primary why my original stories have yet to come up on this forum
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 5, 2008 0:39:54 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]Chapter 2: That Which Scares Kings or Why Hunters Never Prosper[/glow]
"Looks like she has returned. Guess I'll just see how things pan out before going out there. Don't want a repeat of what happened in Arizona."
----------------------------------------------------------
The autumn mists had just cleared. A collective of children were in the graveyard, walking among the debris that now coated the landscape. Many gravestones had large chunks broken off of them and some were completely smashed to pieces. All signs pointed to vandalism and grave robbing at first glance.
Despite various DNA samples in the form of hair and blood and even a clothing sample the Kellwood Police Forensics Division were only able to come up with the culprit wasn't human. Some generous donations to the police and press left the entire town believing the incident to be no more than gang activity.
Of course the Demon Hunters were obligated to take action, action meaning a group of adults in trench coats going to check out the graveyard wherein we still find the collective of children. Now under normal circumstances this would be a matter of adults sweeping children away to do some work but these children are in fact an assortment of various types of undead creatures.
Now of course adults in trench coats in broad daylight have a little bit of a hard time being subtle so most of the undead children were already leaving though the back exit. Three of them stayed all of them watching the demon hunters approach.
Now shifty little Glen Burton had to open his trap up first. "Hey kids this is a crime scene so scram!"
One of the three kids whom wore a skull pendant (Hex) almost said something before the identity of one of the group was nicely and loudly displayed for all nearby by one Blane VanJulivan. "Oh God! It's the little devil. Lets take a strategic retreat! Nothing we have will work on this one!"
"So we're going to let these kids vandalize the graveyard just cause you're too scared to off them!" Rayna shouted at Blaine, her obvious infinite wisdom and sense of tact showing.
"Humph. You are very luck we are trying to find the one that caused this or I would torture and/or kill most of you." The one with solid red eyes and sharp fangs (Charby) shook his fist at the busty red head.
"Charby I think it best we continue to go about our work in peace." The final child with a big... wand (Kavonn) jerked a thumb in the direction of the fissure. "I want to see if theres a trace of what power broke my ward."
After much shouting and the like eventually the humans were gone. Charby, Hex, and Kavonn did a few circles around the fissure that was once a grave. After coming up with nothing they all gave up and made their way home.
----------------------------------------------------------
About halfway home the trio came upon Samrick. "Hello Charby. Have you noticed anything strange recently?"
"Well our dead friend Zeno's grave was broken into and his body was taken." Charby looked at Samrick whom of which seemed quite nervous.
"I see. If you run into a dark skinned girl with a bad attitude and she seems insanely powerful I'm on vacation in China." Samrick waved and ran off for his castle.
"Wonder whats got him so worried?" The trio continued down the path for home.
|
|
|
Post by NightWing on Aug 5, 2008 7:25:33 GMT -5
Oh nice, Samrick says "I'm outta here" xD
Hm... wonder who the first speaker is...
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 5, 2008 7:37:45 GMT -5
Wow. This is coming really well! I love how detailed everything is. ^^ It's looking like this is going to be good. ^^
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 5, 2008 13:46:12 GMT -5
It's Samrick talking first. He knows the new girl very well. Lets just say the grand canyon wasn't so grand until they fought at Arizona XD
|
|
|
Post by NightWing on Aug 5, 2008 16:55:40 GMT -5
Ah ha xD
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 5, 2008 20:41:17 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]Chapter 3: Reversing the Stream[/glow]
It was night; everyone had gone home except of course the nosey demon hunters. Of course it’s not like the demon hunters even had a clue where to look though. They were still playing in the graveyard. The grave robber was long gone from the town district.
Deep in the forest in a clearing the dark skinned female was sitting surrounded by a three-pointed array. Of course that was all smoke and mirrors to deter interlopers more a point of interest was the dead body and scythe laying in front of the girl. The dark skinned girl was in a meditative position with her hood down. Her long black and quite unkempt hair was spread all over the ground. Not even a cricket dared chirp.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
In an alternate dimension the dark skinned girl’s spirit was roaming. “Ahh… limbo. Such wonderful memories.”
Vidor was of course as punctual as ever, taking ten minutes to get to where the girls spirit was. “Ok. Lets get this over with, welcome to limbo I’m here to take you to the great beyond.”
“No I don’t think you are. You’re here to give me a soul of one Zeno Ramera Chavez. And do be quick about it I’ve only got a couple hours of time before my physical manifestation disintegrates and if that happens I’m going to drag that robe through your eyes and use it as reigns to ride your bony but to the depths of whatever hell spawned you!” The dark skinned girl made a very, very nice point of demonstrating her threat to Vidor.
“Well tough luck the only way to do that is to turn the flow of the river Styx.” Vidor crossed his arms. “And I wont do it do you know how many souls I’d have to recollect.”
“Ok I’ll do it. Done.” A large influx of souls poured into the fishbowl limbo.
“I hate you. Anyways I’m getting to work you can get whatever soul you want yourself.” Vidor ran after the escaping souls post haste.
“Fine.” The dark skinned girl sighed and inhaled. “Zeno Ramera Chavez! Report here now or I will return to the living world and destroy Mye Rosenthal Ducayne!”
“Mye!” A small soul rushed forward right into the dark skinned girls soul.
“Ah perfect. Hey, reaper guy don’t you need to wipe his mind on what’s on the other side!” A grumbling Vidor returned to the scene and smacked the Zeno soul on the head.
“There happy? I need a vacation.” Vidor grumbled walking away.
“Perfect. Come with me little soul.” The dark skinned girl grabbed Zeno and with a wink they were gone.
-------------------------------------------------------
Meanwhile back in reality. The dark skinned girl woke up. Giving herself a quick look over she found herself minus a hand and most of her forearm on the left side. Her right arm had a nice glowing blue sphere in it. The girl grinned and looked at the dead body in front of her. It was going to be an interesting night.
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 5, 2008 20:55:27 GMT -5
Wow. This is going to be very interesting.
|
|
|
Post by NightWing on Aug 6, 2008 0:15:06 GMT -5
Very interesting... can't wait to see the next piece
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 6, 2008 20:25:39 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]Chapter 4: Gravestones and Breaking Bones[/glow]
“Ok we know the little devil’s involved so nobody go off on their own.” Blaine had the demon hunters in a tight knit group as they inspected the graveyard.
The full moon washed the site in a pale light. The leaves began to rustle as another fog settled low over the graveyard. A soft voice breezed over the graveyard like a whisper into the ears of the hunters. “The moon is red. The moon is red. It’s dripping blood onto the earth. The moon is raining red on the earth. It’s raining blood.”
The hunters started looking around, save one Victor Marlowe whom neither saw nor heard anything strange for a moment. For the others the moon turned blood red and started to drip. Clouds moved over the graveyard covering the moon quick and quiet. A thunderclap later and it started to rain. It was normal water, Victor could see that, but everyone else saw blood.
After much convincing and shouting everyone was calmed down and soaking wet from the rain. Another thunderclap and there was light in the graveyard once again, for a moment at least. The light left the graveyard once again and the dark skinned girl was in the graveyard again standing on a gravestone in a crouched position. Another thunderclap and she was on another gravestone by Blaine. Yet another thunderclap and she was by Victor.
Of course by now just about every one of the hunters has lost their professional cool and is firing at the girl like their lives depend on it. This was, however, the case as the girl was tired of scare tactics and was systematically taking down the demon hunters one by one without any permanent damage, well permanent to her there may have been the occasional bone fracture here and there, only a little bone showing no harm done.
It was down to the girl and Victor. The girl stopped for a minute tilting her head sideways. “You. You’re different, just different. Relay this to these people when they wake up, get lost and don’t @#^% with my affairs. You may be immune to my mind games but I can still blow you to pieces.”
Another thunderclap and the girl was gone the clouds cleared and the rain subsided. Victor was left alone to clean up the mess with 8 wounded around him most of which unconscious.
|
|
|
Post by ogrefairy on Aug 6, 2008 20:29:24 GMT -5
Wow. O.O So intense! I love it!
|
|
|
Post by NightWing on Aug 6, 2008 23:45:50 GMT -5
Ouch Poor humans never stood a chance. Is Victor going to be taking a role later on, I wonder...
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 6, 2008 23:53:20 GMT -5
i'm wondering the same thing
and those poor humans indeed never did stand a chance. i mean just look at that girl she's a juggernaut of power.
|
|
|
Post by NightWing on Aug 7, 2008 0:31:24 GMT -5
Especially considering that they were too hysteric to even try to fight back. I mean really xD
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 7, 2008 23:55:50 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]Chapter 5: She Who Doesn't Understand Personal Space[/glow]
"So your name is Zeryn Auvry'rahel?"
"Correct."
"And you're the one that revived me?"
"Again correct."
"Well I appreciate that but why are you invading my personal space?" Our newly revived Zeno had at last awakened to find himself being fawned over by the dark skinned girl.
"What is this personal space? No matter how many times it's explained to me I never understand it." Zeryn pursued Zeno around the little fire she had built in a catlike manner crawling around on all fours.
"Personal space is like a bubble that keeps people happy when it's not invaded by unwanteds." Zeno continued to back away even when Zeryn abruptly stopped.
"So you don't like me?" Zeryn's lip quivered and she started to cry loudly.
"No it's not that it's just..." Words escaped Zeno, whom had not witnessed Zeryn's ability to kick butt, he'd just made the person that was responsible for his rebirth cry. Sighing he scooted over to her and gave her a weak hug.
"Yay!" Suddenly Zeryn was happy as can be hugging Zeno.
"So uhh... what are you doing here?" Zeno struggled to grab for conversation to escape this awkward situation.
"Hugging you of course. Oh wait you mean in Kellwood? One of my friends died here and I'm here to resurrect them." Zeryn smiled with a rather ditsy look on her face.
"And why did you resurrect me? Did I know you or something?" Zeno was now seriously confused.
"Nope. But you had really nice enchantments protecting your grave. I couldn't resist smashing them to pieces and I figured it would make amends to the creaters of said enchantments by allowing them to be able to interact with you again." Zeryn giggled in a very girlish way and suddenly forced a raincoat just like hers over Zeno's shoulders. "But first I need your help with something."
|
|
|
Post by tabiris on Aug 7, 2008 23:57:08 GMT -5
dialogue heavy update so not much action or detailing. but still very funny and we see how clearly insane Zeryn is. and we know her name too
|
|