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Post by Stonestrike on Jun 1, 2006 14:41:12 GMT -5
Instead of explaining the rules, I'll demonstrate.
And so on. Let's begin!
I wish I had a big screen TV.
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Post by Shippo_no_Neko on Jun 1, 2006 15:56:03 GMT -5
It comes without a cord.
I wish I could have my cake and eat it, too.
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Post by Stonestrike on Jun 1, 2006 16:01:23 GMT -5
Granted, but cake tastes like dirt from now on.
I wish that I could teleport wherever I want.
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Post by Eclectic Replicant on Jun 1, 2006 18:07:45 GMT -5
Granted, but every time you do it you end up inside a wall or a prison.
I wish i could fly.
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Post by Dundee on Jun 1, 2006 18:18:17 GMT -5
Granted, but the air is so polluted that you'll sooner die of asphyxiation than get the chance to fly.
I wish I had a candy shop.
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Post by Daggertooth on Jun 2, 2006 0:10:23 GMT -5
Granted, But all the candy contains Potassium Benzoate.
I'll make a wish that can't backfire. I wish for a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce and mustard, and, -and- I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises. You got it?
Daggertooth
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Post by Eclectic Replicant on Jun 2, 2006 1:04:58 GMT -5
Granted, but the "samich" was made by Mc Donnalds, so, you die anyway.
I wish i had a robot Jesus.
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magicklorelai
Full Member
"Who told the wall to jump me!?"
Posts: 232
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Post by magicklorelai on Jun 2, 2006 2:48:41 GMT -5
Granted, but now you have to put up with being "saved".
I wish I could get to a healthy weight. (^^; This isn't self pity. So ya know.)
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Post by Daggertooth on Jun 2, 2006 4:21:21 GMT -5
Granted. The National definition of a "healthy weight" has now been altered to fit exactly what you currently are.
I wish for a lifetime supply of cheese. Preserved and shrinkwraped in a way that I don't need to worry about mold or decay or other sorts of perishibleness.
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Post by antonious on Jun 2, 2006 6:47:11 GMT -5
Granted, but as soon as you open the cheese a million rats and mice appear from nowhere and eat every last bit of it.
I wish that I could find out whats wrong with me.
((You also could have called this "The corrupt wish game."))
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Post by Seth Asathi on Jun 4, 2006 11:38:44 GMT -5
I'll make a wish that can't backfire. I wish for a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce and mustard, and, -and- I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises. You got it? (Had to. Sorry Homer. The turkey is a little dry.)
You find out every problem you have, but it takes up your entire life, you die without solving them. But you did know! And knowing is half the battle!
I wish I was dead! . . . .
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Post by Dundee on Jun 4, 2006 11:42:50 GMT -5
Granted, but as soon as you reach the gates of heaven, the system goes down, and you are forced to live for another decade as a zombie until they fix the system again.
I wish I had another wish!
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Augen
Full Member
When God closes a door, he opens another door, which is guarded by vicious ogres.
Posts: 154
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Post by Augen on Jun 4, 2006 14:25:44 GMT -5
Okay, but it gets corrupted.
I wish this wish didn't get corrupted... And I had a perfect life.
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Post by Dundee on Jun 4, 2006 14:50:35 GMT -5
Granted. The perfect life is to become the tyrant of the world, and you die because of guilt and an assassin.
I wish I could erase the memory of watching 'Over the Hedge'. No, seriously, for a comic that I grew up on and loved, it SUCKED.
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Post by Daggertooth on Jun 5, 2006 9:19:54 GMT -5
Granted, the memory of 'Over the Hedge' fades as you are forced to watch every season of "Barny" over and over again.
I wish I owned my own cabin and several acres of land.
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Augen
Full Member
When God closes a door, he opens another door, which is guarded by vicious ogres.
Posts: 154
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Post by Augen on Jun 5, 2006 10:04:22 GMT -5
Granted, but you didn't know about the annual swarm of ckrotch-locusts that have plagued the land for years.
I wish I was free of all external annoyance.
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Post by Seth Asathi on Jun 5, 2006 11:29:19 GMT -5
Granted. You are free of everything anyone ever considered annoying. Enjoy your eternity in limbo.
I wish I had a pony! ><
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Post by Dundee on Jun 5, 2006 13:43:37 GMT -5
Granted. The pony is completely spoiled, and you end up wasting your life savings on it and eventually go poor.
I wish I could dream forever.
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Post by Scarecrow on Jun 5, 2006 17:21:14 GMT -5
Unfortunately, the dreams turn into nightmares concerning giant, maneating pickles, and exploding sheep.
I wish that nobody replies to this message. XD
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Post by Eclectic Replicant on Jun 5, 2006 18:25:22 GMT -5
[nobody talks to you now and you feel horrybly alone]
I wish i where the antichrist.
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Post by Scarecrow on Jun 5, 2006 19:04:54 GMT -5
Crazed christians pummel you to death with crosses.
I wish that a piece of cabbage named Marlon would finally get up the nerve to ask Kelsey the lettuce to the prom. And that she would accept.
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Post by Daggertooth on Jun 5, 2006 20:44:08 GMT -5
Granted, but Durian the rabbit tragically interferes the night before the prom. But they did make for a good meal.
I wish I could find some Blue Cheese for my Salads.
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Augen
Full Member
When God closes a door, he opens another door, which is guarded by vicious ogres.
Posts: 154
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Post by Augen on Jun 5, 2006 21:22:06 GMT -5
Okay, but the blue is really mold.
I wish I owned a Deathnote.
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Post by Dundee on Jun 6, 2006 0:08:56 GMT -5
Granted, but the assassins coming for you get in a car crash on their way to kill you, so it was all pointless.
I wish I wasn't allergic to any animal!
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Post by Seth Asathi on Jun 6, 2006 14:34:34 GMT -5
Granted, you are now allergic to air.
I wish I owned starbucks...
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Post by antonious on Jun 6, 2006 19:12:47 GMT -5
Granted, but your such a bad bussiness man that you run it into the ground.
I wish that I didnt have these tumors on my back.
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Post by Scarecrow on Jun 6, 2006 20:43:57 GMT -5
Poof. Now there are holes in your back, where they once were.
I wish my brain would stop frying, so that I would stop seeing demon-newty-bat-things climbing up the walls. They're kinda cute, though.
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Post by antonious on Jun 7, 2006 7:41:46 GMT -5
Granted, but in return your no longer able to read Charby the vampirate!
I wish that I could have as much artistic skill as Amelius.
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Post by Seth Asathi on Jun 7, 2006 15:52:08 GMT -5
Granted, but you are now blind so you will never be able to appreciate your own artwork.
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Augen
Full Member
When God closes a door, he opens another door, which is guarded by vicious ogres.
Posts: 154
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Post by Augen on Jun 7, 2006 18:39:50 GMT -5
Granted. Nothing happens.
I wish people would stop killing the planet.
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