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Post by Seth Asathi on Nov 23, 2006 20:06:03 GMT -5
A cashier at Wal-Mart has been having a very bad day, filled with coupons. She sees yours, and goes ballistic! The fingernails to the eyes don't kill you, but the cash-register across the skull, combined with a stilleto heel to the lung finishes the job.
An old pair of socks.
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okuni
Junior Member
'How to Win' by Sanzo
Posts: 57
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Post by okuni on Dec 5, 2006 13:01:25 GMT -5
You have an old favorite pair of lucky socks that you never EVER wash (ew!). One night, a night before you have a school championship game, your best friends sleep over. They find your socks and, for giggles, place the things over your nose and mouth. They expect you to wake up. You do, but end up choking on the dirty fumes of the socks and die of asphyxiation. So much for the "lucky" socks.
A christmas tree ornament.
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Post by Seth Asathi on Dec 8, 2006 10:14:28 GMT -5
It is a delicate glass christmas tree ornament... very old, painted with lead paints. You hang it up, but accidently knock over the tree as you do so. It falls away from you, and in your haste to grab it and steady it, you fall... onto the ornament which shatters directly underneath your throat. It doesn't cut you, but in your haste to get away from it you bump into the wall, causing the light fixture to fall on you, knocking you forward once more. Your foot lands on the ornament bits, and you slip, falling backwards to the floor. Your head splits open like a ripe melon on impact!
An overly long post...
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Dragyn
Junior Member
CAKE!
Posts: 70
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Post by Dragyn on Dec 8, 2006 23:29:48 GMT -5
You are reading aloud, but get bored with the post and, mid sentence, try to skip to the end. The resulting sentence is actually a dark summoning spell, and the summoned demon eats your soul.
A bottle of non-toxic, washable paint from some little-known company.
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Post by Seth Asathi on Dec 12, 2006 10:31:35 GMT -5
The paint is non toxic, but the bottle is made with a well known carcinogen. Sorry but the tumor is inoperable. You have six... five... four... three....
A really tasteless post.
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Post by RainyRibbon on Jan 2, 2007 21:05:16 GMT -5
You get hunted down by the guild of amazon huntresses that pwn newbs >D And you die.
A pair of soft, cottony bloomers
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Post by DarkfireTaimatsu on Jan 3, 2007 0:01:44 GMT -5
You end up being forced to wear them in public and die of embarrassment. I swear it's possible.
A toothless, brittle, 90-year-old man with memory problems and hearing loss.
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Post by Dundee on Jan 3, 2007 0:22:20 GMT -5
A toothless, brittle, 90-year-old man with memory problems and hearing loss is the lunch guy in your school cafeteria. You die because it's SCHOOL LUNCH.
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Post by Seth Asathi on Jan 3, 2007 15:31:22 GMT -5
Everything is nothing. You were never born to begin with.
phlegm
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Post by lordofcheese on Jun 28, 2007 20:15:03 GMT -5
You're sick and begin to hork up some phlegm when you become distracted by a conveniently located pie saleman. When you try to order a blueberry pie the phlegm in your mouth spews all over him. He is extrodinarily offended and promptly removes your innards for their use in a meat pie.
A wallet with two twentys and seven coins of various value in it.
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Post by Deraymou on Jun 29, 2007 0:13:22 GMT -5
A wallet with two twentys and seven coins of various value in it. One of the coins looks tastey and you eat it, not only was it NOT candy, and in fact a half dollar, it had rust on it. As you cough up the coin, you realize you haven't had a tetnous shot ever. You die by lockjaw!
a myriad
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Post by NightWing on Jun 29, 2007 12:00:40 GMT -5
It happens to be a myriad of killer bees, who hunt you down to the ends of the Earth, stinging you to death.
The internet
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Post by Angel--of--Music on Jun 29, 2007 18:43:37 GMT -5
The chatspeakers almost kill me, but I beat them all of with a giant wand. But one tackles me and chatspeaks me to death.
Zombie attack
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Post by Deraymou on Jun 29, 2007 19:24:01 GMT -5
Well The zombie hoarde comes down upon me, and I easily fend them all off, slaughtering everything in my path. I destroy every zombie, onyl to discover I'm now going to suffocate in their viscera...
A breath fo fresh air
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Post by lordofcheese on Jun 29, 2007 20:01:34 GMT -5
You're happily living your life in delusion until a breath of fresh air forces you to face facts: your spouse is cheating on your, your job isn't worth travelling to, and there is nothing on the internet, but web comics and nude photos. So you jump from a bridge.
A headless dandelion stem.
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Post by Deraymou on Jun 30, 2007 2:35:52 GMT -5
(that was amazing. I didn't think of twisting it around backward like that)
You pluck up the dandilion stem cuz it looks unsightly, and you look at it saying, "hey, its hollow..." and decide to use it as a straw for fun. Little do most know, the milky fluid in them is poisonous if consumed, and little do you know that you're highly allergic to it! Your tongue swells up and you choke to death.
Cthulu
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Post by {×ÏÑk§tÊ®88×} on Jul 23, 2007 12:10:29 GMT -5
its a sea monster.it drowns you!
a speck.
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Post by Angel--of--Music on Jul 23, 2007 17:14:37 GMT -5
This is no ordinary speack, it's a killer speck. It eats me.
A kleenex box.
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Post by {×ÏÑk§tÊ®88×} on Jul 23, 2007 22:01:31 GMT -5
i eat the kleenex and choke.
a tv.
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Post by Angel--of--Music on Jul 24, 2007 21:21:11 GMT -5
Tony is very upset that I'm stalking him, so he takes the cabin's Tv and throws it at my head. I bleed to death.
A pencil.
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Post by {×ÏÑk§tÊ®88×} on Jul 24, 2007 21:43:33 GMT -5
i stab you with it.for puking on me in a different thread!
a hair.
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Post by Deraymou on Jul 25, 2007 16:24:17 GMT -5
The hair is rooted quite firmly into a cyclops nose... you pull it ou and it sneezes...
A kitten... WITH SPIKES
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Post by Angel--of--Music on Jul 25, 2007 16:43:30 GMT -5
The kitten jumps up and starts stabbing me and scratching me. I bleed to death.
A weasle
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Post by {×ÏÑk§tÊ®88×} on Jul 25, 2007 17:10:29 GMT -5
it eats your chikens.your are flat broke.you starve to death.
a piece of tape
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Post by Angel--of--Music on Jul 25, 2007 21:17:05 GMT -5
(nice death)
The tape gets lodged in my throte and I suffocate.
A goldfish
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Post by {×ÏÑk§tÊ®88×} on Jul 25, 2007 21:55:13 GMT -5
(same to you) its just a shark that someone panted orange.
some sand.
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Post by Deraymou on Jul 26, 2007 0:55:15 GMT -5
youse trapped in a sand clock, the sand pours slowly over you, you release a final scream of terror that is cut short as the sand slowly flows into your mouth, slowly but surely suffocating you
Tony's hat
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Post by Angel--of--Music on Jul 26, 2007 16:23:19 GMT -5
I steal Tony's hat, but he wants revenge and kills me.
A CD.
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Post by {×ÏÑk§tÊ®88×} on Jul 26, 2007 16:36:55 GMT -5
you shatter it,and it cuts a vital artery and you bleed to death.
some grass.
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Post by Angel--of--Music on Jul 26, 2007 18:08:47 GMT -5
I eat some grass. Since I am allergic, hives break out in my throte and soon invade my windpipe. I suffocate.
A tablet pen.
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